Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
