I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Randomize
