Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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