Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
