Can Purell be used as lube?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize