Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
