Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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