Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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