Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize