You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.