so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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