Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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