Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
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He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
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The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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