He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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