i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
