Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
You left your phone here
Wait...
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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