So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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