I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
