Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize
