I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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