you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Randomize
