We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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