arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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