i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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