i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
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Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
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My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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