Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
it was like eating out sand paper
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
