I think I am morally bankrupt
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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