walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
