The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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