He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize