that's an acceptable place to lick
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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