Sponge bath it is.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
