I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
from now on my penis is your penis
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Farmville is her only friend.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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