Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
