please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
