Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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