I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
