I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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