Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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