I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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