omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
It's just like the Real World with babies
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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