Porn is love you can see.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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