I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
