this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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