imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
