My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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