Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
