I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Screwed.edu
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
