i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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