I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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